One Thing You Can Do with Legitimate Anger

I have often been taught that anger is dangerous. And it was - often because I kept it pent up. And then I'd explode. Another reason anger could be dangerous for me was because the people who were violating me - the cause of the anger - were gaslighting me and...

One Thing You Can Do with Legitimate Anger

Step 2 and Your Relationship to Power

I don't know about you, but I really struggled with the spiritual basis of the Twelve Step program. Fortunately for me, and I suspect for many of us, I was desperate. And I was also hearing people tell my story. And for the first time, I knew I wasn't alone. I...

Step 2 and Your Relationship to Power

What Einstein Taught Me About Step 3

I was in grad school when I first got into recovery. One of the challenges I had in those early days was reconciling my heady intellectual pursuits with the spiritual process of the Twelve Steps. I especially struggled with what it meant to decide to turn your will...

What Einstein Taught Me About Step 3

A New Take on Step 10

I used to think that Step 10 had the be THE. LEAST. SEXY. of all the 12 Steps. First of all, there was no drama in it. Not like Steps 4, 5, or 9. Second, it assured us that even after we had completed an inventory and made amends we would continue to be wrong. The...

A New Take on Step 10

One Way to Change Your Perspective on Fear

One of my favorite quotes is "Everything you want is just outside your comfort zone," by Robert Allen. Which means, I have to accept being uncomfortable if I want to change and grow. The challenge for me is, the discomfort triggers fear. As a coach, I read A LOT...

One Way to Change Your Perspective on Fear

Why Having a RELATIONSHIP with God is Critical

Do you struggle to believe God will help you with your challenges? I sure did. Sometimes I still do. But my struggles went beyond the Second Step, "Came to believe a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity." After spending a fair amount of time in...

Why Having a RELATIONSHIP with God is Critical

The Gifts From Those You Resent

As I became an adult, there was one thing I was most adamant I would never do: become like my mother. Oh dear God, PLEASE don't EVER let me become like my mother! And for the longest time, I was real clear on all the ways in which I was never. ever. going to be...

The Gifts From Those You Resent